My 40th birthday was on Tuesday, and in true form I started to get all nostalgic and feel all the feels.💓 I have been reflecting back on how much has shifted and changed for me over these last few years.
Sure, I’ve had some big milestones like getting married to Mark…
Having our children…
…and transitioning to a more creative career as a self-employed blogger. But it is really so much more than those big changes. There have been a ton of valuable lessons squeezed into in the quiet, ordinary, less spectacular parts of my life.
I realize that there is so much I love about getting older. So I thought I’d take a break from recipes today to share what I love about being 40. 💖🙌🏻
A bunch of my friends have turned 40 this year too, and so I dedicate this post to all of you.💖🤗And really, this applies to getting older in general. And we are all in that boat, right?! 😉🤗
These are based on my own experience, by the way. I am totally okay if you disagree or don’t resonate with all of these. Just enjoy any of the ones you do resonate with. Just do you, friends!🙌🏻
Here are 40 things I LOVE about being forty so far.
- I understand myself so much better: my nature, my patterns, my strengths.
- Having a deeper connection to my intuition and gut impressions. I question those intuitive hits a lot less and trust my gut a lot more.
- Realizing and accepting how much I don’t know.
- I can hold space for conflicting viewpoints, both within myself and with others without feeling so….well, conflicted. 😉
- I am less attached to being right. I mess up all the time, and I don’t mind owning up to it quite as much as I used to.
- Realizing that perfection is an illusion and does not exist. Despite what someone’s Instagram feed looks like, I know that life is messy sometimes, no matter who you are.
- Embracing and LOVING the imperfect parts of myself and my life.💖YES!
- I have stopped apologizing for so much. I recently became aware of how much I said “I’m sorry” for dumb stuff that is neither my fault nor my responsibility…or completely inconsequential.🤷🏼♀️ Like showing up bare-faced or wet-headed. 💁🏼♀️ #notsorry
- Having less of a need for certainty
- Embracing all of life’s mystery.💫
- Realizing it is easier than I imagined to just be me and show up authentically as myself.🙌🏻
- Releasing on a deeper level what people think about me. Other people’s opinions have moved way-hay-hay down my list of things that take up space in my mind. Yes, I am being brutally honest and admitting that it is sometimes on the list at all. The goal is to get it totally OFF the list.😉Right?! But for now, I am happy with moving down in priority.
- Not judging myself so much.
- Having much more nurturing, compassionate intentions with myself. I used to be really hard on myself, y’all! I still fall back into that sometimes too, but I am much more aware of it now. And I know it doesn’t serve me to be harsh with myself.
- Not judging others. Once you stop judging yourself, it is amazing how much easier it is to stop judging other people too. Most people are just doing the best they can at any given moment, even if it doesn’t look like it.
- Richer, more meaningful friendships.
- Having the courage to ask for what I want directly, without waiting around for somebody to notice. Because in life, you get what you have the courage to ask for. 🙌🏻
- Spending more time pursuing what I love, what lights me up, what sparks my curiosity.
- Leaning into that sense of awe and wonder about life…through the eyes of my kids, especially.
- Gaining more clarity around the things I want to surrender. It’s more surrender than I thought I wanted, actually. 😂 But I’m SO okay with that!👌🏻
- Saying I love you more, to friends and family. I used to think it was sort of awkward to say “I love you” to my friends, but I do it all the time now.
- Finding so much joy and appreciation for simple things.
- Having a deeper appreciation for grace and forgiveness. Grace is so powerful, and it can remove so much of the heaviness and burdens, especially in relationships with others.
- Choosing heart over hustle. 💖
- Choosing real over perfect. 🙌🏻
- Embracing life’s intangibles more, like creativity and intuition. These are two things that are super valuable to me, but they can be hard to understand, define or pin down. They don’t fit in a box. But I kind of love that.
- Less fear in trying something new.
- Less fear in putting myself out there, authentically and vulnerably.
- Less fear of failure. Failure is just part of learning and growing, and I have learned to embrace it more. Failure doesn’t make me bad, wrong or unworthy. It simply teaches me what not to do next time. 😆👍🏻
- Choosing appreciation over expectation. Sometimes we get so attached to how we want others to show up or how we want events to play out. It is so much easier if you just allow others to show up just as they are, allow events to unfold and appreciate the best parts of all of it…rather than dwell on unmet expectations.
- Learning to value stillness and spaciousness. I don’t need to fill every second of my time with activity and stimulation. I don’t need to fill every space in my closet or every nook in my house either. Sometimes, it feels really good to be super low key and just get still and quiet. Plus, space allows for new good things to flow in.
- Realizing that we are all so much more alike than different. I see myself in others a lot more than I used to.
- I don’t mistake pedicures and massages for self-care. Don’t get me wrong, I love those things! But! In the past I used them to numb out and escape from the unpleasant parts of my life that I did not want to deal with. My definition of self-care has changed. I care for myself by realizing what’s coming up for me, what I need, what’s real and what needs to be addressed directly, getting to the root of what needs to be changed or shifted.
- Radical honesty with myself is much easier than it used to be. Admitting hard or unpleasant things to myself feels much safer now than it did a few years ago.
- Admitting hard or unpleasant things to others feels easier than it used to.
- Less of a need to explain myself. This has been SO freeing! I only recently realized how much I felt the need to justify my stance on something with an explanation. Nope, not so much any more.💁🏼♀️ Glory be! No is a complete sentence, y’all. 😆👏🏻
- Resisting my sensitive nature less. I am an HSP. I pick up on a lot y’all. I am super tuned in to the emotions of others, and I care deeply about people. It used to make me feel a little weak and fragile, mostly because I felt responsible for helping everyone. But now I am starting to realize that most of the time all people want is our presence and understanding. My sensitivity is part of what makes me unique, plus it informs my internal GPS and intuition. It’s my God-given superpower, y’all. 💥💪🏻
- Shifting away from a need to “fit in” and moving toward more of a need to be my true self on an even deeper level, in full integrity.
- Realizing that it is safe to be seen for who I truly am.
- Releasing any beliefs, patterns and limitations that were never mine to begin with. We pick up a lot of beliefs from our environment, y’all. Over the years I have developed discernment to realize when a value or belief that I am living from doesn’t match up with my own. That came for me with age and experience.
I hope y’all enjoyed that! Happy 40th birthday to me and all my friends before me. Here’s to the next 40! 💓🤗